Shiloh, Pax, Zahara, Vivienne, Knox, Maddox, Betsy, Betty, Saint, Cliff, Margie, Eddie and all you other Jolie-Pitt children, listen up. I hope to gawd you aren’t expecting that corvette or that Fisher-Price Loving Family Dollhouse this year because I hate to break it to ya…Santa isn’t coming. In fact, he’s going to zoom right past your chateau this holiday season. Yep. I really don’t think he wants to go through the hassle of getting past your 1902934 security guards who populate your estate. Those guys are FIERCE and are no force to be reckoned with!
No, no, no…it’s not that you haven’t been naughty, by any means…it’s just that you have too much shit! Being a part of the Sainthood that you are, you best realize right now that you can’t always get what you want…as long as Papa Brad’s in control of Santa’s sleigh.
This year, you are making your own shit! It’s about to get all Martha Stewart in the Jolie-Pitt chateau this year. HOLLA!
Papa Brad dished to Hello! magazine about his holiday gift giving idea and his craftiness…
“So we have gifts, but we try to keep the money spent to a minimum. The rule is that everyone’s got to make something for someone else, you got to put time into it. We do exchange gifts, although we don’t feel any pressure to make them big or expensive gifts.”
Well, that just sucks. Screw yarn, paper, glitter and markers. If I was Brad’s kid, I’d be asking for a Ferrari, Rock Band 2, a trip to Hawaii, a Jimmy Choo ‘Ring’ Patent Leather Hand Bag and an Elmo Live doll so I could sell it on eBay. So much for my idea for wanting to be adopted by these two anymore!
Image Source: Matrix