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Celebrity VIP Lounge

Celebrity Gossip Heard All Over The Web

X Factor Ratings Drop Even More

Perhaps Simon Cowell should beg Britney back on the show, then steal her ‘scripts and watch her go mental on live television. Because he may have booted the allegedly crazy singer from the show and blamed her for the falling ratings, but it ain’t Britney’s fault, y’all!

Something in the milk ain’t clean!

X Factor returned on Wednesday with not a bang but a thud this week, averaging 6.2 million viewers. With new judges Kelly Rowland and Paulina Rubio joining Cowell and Demi Lovato, many insiders (including Simon Cowell himself) thought the show would get a boost in the ratings. As it turns out, that is not the case and now the finger pointing has started. Why are the ratings dropping?

Is it possible that it could be Simon Cowell himself?

No one close to him would dare say it, but it very well could be. His recent babymama drama certainly has not endeared him to any new fans, and his big-headedness means he will never lave his own show even if it’s fault the ratings are in decline.

So what say ye, VIPers?

Why is this ship sinking so fast that even Kelly Rowland’s glorious breasticles cannot keep it afloat?!

additional reporting: A. Neff King

Simon Cowell Is Expecting!

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We may have to bring out Maury Povich on this one to verify it only for the wow factor, but this is more drama than we ever anticipated from the Brit. After latching on to more women than George Clooney could shake a contract at, Simon Cowell has finally gotten caught without the condom on. And it doesn’t stop there!

There’s more!

The babymama is none other than the wife of Andrew Silverman, real estate barron and close friend to Cowell. Lauren Silverman is nearly three months pregnant and this would be the first child for Simon after a string of girlfriends over the last 30 years.

Do we hear wedding bells? Probably not.

But we do smell checks!

Yes!

And lots of them!

Stay tuned….

Randy Jackson to America Idol: I Quit

They say the best defense is an exceptional offense. Buoyed by reports that surfaced just only yesterday that producers of American Idol are seeking to replace all the judges, not only Mariah Carey, Randy Jackson has beat them to the punch by running to the press himself and declaring that he is leaving the show after 12 years and millions of ‘yo dawg’s’ later.

If you remember way back last year, the producers kept Randy on and signed Mariah, since getting her to sign was contingent on him remaining on the panel himself. Here is what he had to say about this latest newsrandy:

“Yo! Yo! Yo! To put all of the speculation to rest, after 12 years of judging on American Idol I have decided it is time to leave after this season. I am very proud of how we forever changed television and the music industry. It’s been a life changing opportunity but I am looking forward to focusing on my company Dream Merchant 21 and other business ventures.”

Plug for his company, undercover verbal slap to the AI producers, and could he now be joining up with Simon Cowell on X-Factor? Stay tuned….

American Idol Judges: “Replace ALL The Judges!”

So after the whispers this season that Mariah Carey was the problem when it came to the sliding ratings of American Idol, the producers have decided that it’s more than just one diva. It may be all four, to which they have responded…

Replace them all!

That’s right, folks, Randy Jackson, who somehow has managed to avoid being kicked off for years and years, is now about to be unemployed if the producers have their way for next season. After twelve years, it goes without saying that the show is about as stale as Randy’s “yo dawgs” and something drastic must be done. Insiders at the show already know that Mariah Carey will definitely not return. And why should she after they lied to her about being the only diva on the panel and then threw in Tricki Fromajai at the last minute? There is even talk of bringing back the original three judges if X Factor is ever canceled. That means Randy, Paula, and Simon would be reunited and Americans everywhere would yet again be wondering what exactly Paula is sipping in that cup!

The ratings are down 22% this year, and no one seems to care who wins either. If you put a gun to our head, we could not even name the final three singers. But then again, we have not been able to do that for a few seasons.

Sue us!

additional reporting: A. Neff King

Khloe Kardashian 86’ed from The X Factor

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Well, it looks like another Kardashian is going to be in the unemployment line. Oh, wait a minute. There is no line when you’re fame whores! Only corners!

The X Factor announced yesterday that although Mario Lopez will be returning for the fall premiere of the television show, its other co-host, Khloe Kardashian, will not. This show has had more slots filled than a well…you know how to finish that sentence!

Simon Cowell and Demi Lovato will be returning in the fall as well, but Antonio ‘L.A.’ Reid and Britney Spears will not be returning in the fall. Who will fill these slots for the upcoming season? There are alot of people that could fill those seats. The question is if they would want to. Everyone knows that Simon Cowell is a c*nt to work with and the ratings are not exactly stellar for this American Idol rip-off. They should have kept Britney and replaced her Diet Coke with some sizzurrp and watched the ratings really take off!

Simon Cowell Has New Way To Find Big Stars

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We all know that Simon Cowell is an industry gawd and he makes more money than he knows what to do with. And yeah, he has contributed a whole hell of a lot to the music business. So now that he is absent from Idol he has had a bit more time on his hands to do some thinking…some brainstorming. And you’ll never guess what he decided to come up with now.

The You Generation.

Yes, that is what it is called…the YOU Generation, basically a YouTube channel project that he will showcase new up and coming artists.

So here’s the deal, artists who want to be the next big star can upload their audition videos and sing, dance, style, cook or do whatever they so choose (within reason, of course) to get the attention of the big man.

Already, there are a HUGE number of subscribers with their eyes and ears ready to hear what Simon is looking for.

According to Reuters, You Generation territories were listed as Australia, Hong Kong, India, Indonesia, Japan, Malaysia, New Zealand, Philippines, Singapore, South Korea, Taiwan, Belgium, Ireland, Netherlands, Britain, Czech Republic, France, Israel, Poland, Russia, Spain, Canada, the United States, Mexico, Argentina and Brazil.

Let LeAnn Be LeAnn!

And what we would be allowing her to be is a drunk hussy. Because that’s exactly what she was on X Factor the other night! Did anyone see that? It was like Valley of the Dolls on a gin & tonic spree! Now, LeAnn insists she was sober, but even Stevie Wonder could tell she was drunk as a skunk!

Simon Cowell was asked about whether or not he thought she was indeed hammered and he would not go right out admit that he thought she was drunk, but the proof was in the (spiked) pudding! He even wants her to be back on the show!

Do you really think Simon Cowell would miss an opportunity to broadcast a live episode of White Girl Wasted syndrome to millions of Americans? Of course not! And here were all were, thinking Britney would be the first person on that show to bring the crazy.

Leave it to LeAnn to bring it first.

And let me not forget that LeAnn spoiled poor little Carly Rose’s chances at winning the other night. Can you even call it a duet if only one person is coherent?! Oh Lord! I never thought I’d be saying this, but…

Team Britney!!

Khloe Kardashian Releases Her Areolas…Live

You know those Kardashians. They just cannot keep their clothes on. And this case is no different as her true DNA shown through…her blouse. I guess the KK mantra is: when in doubt, flash it!

Last night’s episode has received a lot of attention, but for not the right reasons. Of course, if rawng reasons are involved, then so is a Kardashian. And although Khloe may be the classiest Kardashian (as if that’s a stretch), she still has traces of Kim flowing through her veins. So it comes as no shock that her breasts decided to make their national debut on live television as well.

Simon Cowell, ever the wise ass, tried to let Khloe know that her girls were at attention, but did she know what he was talking about?

Hell to the naw!

So the show carried on and viewers probably tuned in more.

And did Mario Lopez even bother to look over at her titty balls? This leads credence to the theory that KKO is a man, because everyone knows Lopez will dry hump any real woman in a ten mile radius.

Let’s see if she is wearing any panties on the next live show.

Birthday Bitches

Simon Cowell is 53.

Joy Behar is 70.

John Mellencamp is 61.

Mary Badham is 60.

Michael W. Smith is 55.

Toni Braxton is 45.

Thom Yorke of Radiohead is 44.

Taylor Hicks (“American Idol”) is 36.

Khloe Kardashian as a Co-Host?

After reporting only a few days ago that Khloe Kardashian was a sure lock for the gig as host of X Factor next season, now comes word that s/he is not man enough for the job and now producers are scurrying for more testosterone on the show in the form of two co-hosts. What other men are vying for the coveted position?

Sources connected to the show have added Mario Lopez and Corbin Bleu as the other two possibly sharing the stage with Khloe, who is allegedly Simon Cowell’s top selection. Corbin Bleu factors in as the possible host waiting in the wings if contracts cannot be worked out between Kardashian or Lopez.

If this show potentially takes a Kardashian off their own reality show, maybe this is a good thing. But does this mean Khloe will be more of a presence on a large network? Maybe this is not a good thing for KK haters? The only thing this possible gig proves is that a Kardashian can actually read.

Because We All Need a Little More Kardashian In Our Lives

Just when I was getting used to the sheer bliss of not having to watch anything Kardashian related for the last few weeks, it is now being reported that not only is another Kardashian getting a show, but on a network that doesn’t rhyme with ‘pee’.

It seems that someone is enamored with a Kardashian and wants it (yes, I said IT) for his show. Which one of these tricks is getting a chance to shine in her (and I use that pronoun ever so lightly) own new way?

Khloe Kardashian, aka The Ugly Sister, is about to be signed as the hostess to X Factor. That is if Simon Cowell has his way and FOX agrees. You know the world is coming to a fast S T O P when a case is being made by one of the most powerful men in entertainment to place Chewbacca’s long lost sister into a huge show. Cowell claims that the other people up for the job just don’t have that extra something that Khloe has. That being said, most women don’t have elongated clitorises, but hey, what do I know. Simon also believes that Demi Lovato and Britney Spears have a connection and that the three of them together could be ratings gold. Dare I even attempt to theorize on what these three could have in common besides having more issues than People and Time combined?

Let’s wait a few days and see what happens, folks. Because the decision will be revealed in less than a week. Sources connected to this say it is very likely Khloe will get the slot.

Oh happy goddamn day!

Howard Stern Criticizes Simon Cowell For Hiring Britney Spears!

Loud mouth Howard Stern is now criticizing Simon Cowell for hiring Britney Spears for America’s The X-Factor and he thinks that she will be a got damn “train wreck” on the show. Yes oh yes she will. But oh Howard, this is all about television ratings, NOT for who will be the best judge!

Stern tells Access Hollywood, “Britney still thinks the Earth is flat. Listen, I think we’re going to tune in to see her, if she can sort of function through the thing… As far as any real criticism, I think Simon and (fellow judge) L.A. Reid will be doing that. I think Britney is going to stand there and eat a lollipop and wear a sexy outfit. I don’t anticipate great opinions out of her. I think she’s going to sit there like J.Lo (American Idol judge Jennifer Lopez) and (say), ‘Oh, you’re wonderful. You’re terrific. Do you think I could get a perfume endorsement out of this? You think I could perform on the show?’ I think that’s what it’s about… I’ll tune in to see what kind of train wreck she is, absolutely.”

Well he does have a point. I know I’ll be watching just to see if Britney can fully function because really, when was the last time we’ve actually heard the girl talk?

Britney Spears Is About To Make It Rain

Simon Cowell is obviously not paying any attention to me, because I have just learned that not only is he trying to snag the grand dame of the Louisiana swamps for X Factor, but he is also in negotiations to pay the lip-syncing pop star upwards of $15 million dollars for next season.

As I type this, Britney’s handlers are working out the small print of the deal, but it is basically a foregone conclusion that she will be judging the show next season, replacing one of the seats left vacant by Paula Abdul and Nicole Scherzinger. The final contract must go through several people before it is approved – namely Britney’s father, who is conservator over her and her estate, as well as the judge that oversees the conservatorship. Britney’s soon to be husband is also reportedly playing a prominent role in the negotiations.

Simon Cowell, the X Factor executive producer, said this week: “I would love to have her on the show. I think she would be a fascinating person to sit next to.”

I can read between the lines. This is what he really means…

“I cannot wait to get that crazy, country ass bumpkin on live TV. Hopefully, her brain will split into a million pieces on air and we can get the ratings I need!”

Simon said an announcement could come within the week.

Excuse me, but wasn’t it Cowell himself that said a few weeks ago that he would never shell out that much money to one celebrity judge because it was not in the budget? How quickly times change. The good thing is that by snatching up Britney, you’re getting more than one person…on a good day, you could have several faces of cray cray. The other good bad news is that there is only a 7-second time delay on live TV.

For $15 million dollars a year, Britney better bring the crazy, because anything less deserves a full refund!

SAVE A HEAUX: An Open Letter to Simon Cowell

Because yes, folks, it’s true. A heaux can be either gender and by far the heaux of the moment appears to be the only man in Hollywood with titty balls almost as famous as a woman’s…Simon Cowell.

Not only is a new biography on him set to hit the marketplace and release new information on his private life, there are other things happening around the mogul that are coming to light.

He has been outed by Sharon Osbourne as a tiny-meated himbo after he accused her of leaving X Factor because of his affair with Dannii Minogue (who’s still denying it ever happened to which I say… “whatever, lying ass liar!”). Sharon Osbourne may be a lot of things: overly botoxed, lipo’ed, nipped and tucked, but one thing she is not…is a liar!
Also in the news lately is how Cowell has given his latest ex-girlfriend an LA pad valued at over $8 million dollars. Now, even I know in the gold-digger’s handbook of hussery this should be viewed with intense skepticism. True gold-diggers usually have to marry it and pop a few babies out of their worn out poons before they are eligible for such assets, but Simon’s tricks are not even having to go that far. Do they possess magical poon action or is Simon Cowell paying off these girls to not speak on his tiny meat or philandering?

Um, yeah. There’s your answer!

I’ve got some advice for Simon Cowell, because I’m Sir Heaux here to save a heaux. So, I will lay it all out on the line and pray no one snorts it.

Dear Simon,

First of all, you need to stop getting hitched up with women that look like trannies. From Sinitta, Terri Seymour, and the recently tricked, then kicked to the curb Mezhgan Hussainy, stop cavorting with these ladies that look like ladyboys! All the girls I have seen you with look like the kind Eddie Murphy would try to give a ride home at three in the morning. This is not helping kill that rumor that you are gay and homosexual-like either.

Secondly, stop getting engaged to these alleged women! For what? Everyone knows you’re not going to marry them. Stop stringing them along. Just be a playboy for the rest of your life and have women on both sides of the Atlantic. Besides, it’s better for business.

Third? If you want X Factor to thrive in America, you need to listen to me carefully on this next one. If you don’t listen to the other two, you should definitely listen to this last one…

Do not hire Britney Spears to be a judge! Are you mad?!She can’t read the cue cards! What advice can she offer contestants? She can’t even lip-sync on time!

Heaux up…or blow up!
That is all.

Simon Cowell Robbed After One Night Stand!

Simon Cowell is a man who loves hookers. Who knew? For how prim and proper this guy seems to be and for all the money he rolls in, you would think he would be choosy in the women he hooks up with. Instead, he opts for one night stands like the rest of those celebrity heaux. And unfortunately, his fooling around with an unknown got him into a bit of trouble.

According to The Sun, Simon had been drinking at Drai’s nightclub in Hollywood last October when he met a woman and really wanted to have sexy time with her. So he went through the sneaky sneaking past hotel staff to get her into his room. Apparently when he woke up, the woman he did the nasty with was gone AND emptied out his wallet and stolen his computer, which had some important “X-Factor” documents on it. Damn!

Biographer Tom Bower has a book coming out called “Sweet Revenge: The Intimate Life of Simon Cowell” and there is more than just that story to dish on.

One of the most juicy stories was that Cowell had an affair with “The X Factor” judge Dannii Minogue, who split from the father of her son just this month after four years together!

Former X-Factor judge Sharon Osbourne confirmed the news saying that the affair “wasn’t a secret” and that Simon was exercising his one-eyed willy with both model Jasmine Lennard and make-up artist Julia Carta. AND to top it all off, he was carrying on his shenanigans with all these women while he was engaged to former-fiance Mezghan Hussainy.

As for the rumors that Sharon Osbourne left “Factor” because Simon and Dannii were getting it on, she made her point clear. “I’m not Simon’s mother – I don’t give a toss who he [bleeps]. I didn’t leave the show because Simon and Dannii were [bleeping], I left because she became unbearable.”

Well she became unbearable because she was probably sick of sharing Simon with everyone and their got damn mother! That bankroll was being fought for!