And I say that because why would you want to get married when you’re 9000 years old? And furthermore, can you even walk down the aisle when you’re that old? His bladder may give way before the end of the ceremony as it is. All I hope is that Crystal has slapped a diaper on Hugh Hefner’s wrinkled ass before she says ‘I do’.
As we all know, Crystal Harris was set to marry the owner of Playboy about a year and a half ago, but five days before the ceremony, Crystal looked at her young face, brand new, store bought titty balls, and decided to play the runaway bride.
Well apparently, Hugh Hefner has a forgiving pacemaker because he has yet again decided to tie the knot with this twat on New Year’s Day.
That is, if he’s still alive.
Now, we all know that Hugh Hefner only has a few more days on this earth, so I say let an old man have his cake and eat it too. When you’ve lived longer than three Golden Girls, the black plague, and survived the Titanic…you deserve to do whatever the hell you want!
Congrats to the couple and I wish them minutes of happiness!